Confession time: People tell me I have a ton of confidence and that I’m nice and empathetic.
The truth is, a lot of that comes from having a sucky life and learning everything the hard way.
Like, scarred for life kind of life. Molested, raped, neglected, broke, homeless, family law drama … been there, done that, got the tee shirt. 🙈
And what happens when you’ve had that kind of life is that until you get your 🐒 mental monkeys 🐒 in order, you’ll attract all kinds of narcissists, energy vampires, and abusers into your life.
While I DEFINITELY saw this in my love life…
I ALSO saw this in client relationships too…
And the experiences cost me hundreds of thousands in lost work and a whole boatload of misery and self-doubt. 😭😭😭😭
Over the years, I attracted just plain terrible clients who took advantage of me.
Or on the flipside, I attracted good clients but created bad working relationships because I wasn’t doing authentic work and living authentically. 🙁
Either way, the whole point of consulting – great results – didn’t happen as often as I would have liked.
Which is why, I think, almost every expert and “guru” you talk to will recommend books and mentoring on MINDSET before they recommend ninja tactics, strategies, or tools.
Tools are useless until you can actually USE them.
I’ll share my own mindset resource recommendations in a moment.
But first, let’s talk about the 7 types of clients you attract when you aren’t your authentic, powerful self (and the 4 you attract when you get your ducks in a row):
👉Actually Broke Brenda
This type of client is actually broke, and expects free work. They will give you the biggest sob story about how bad off they are, but when you give them advice, they don’t implement. Or if they pay you, they’ll nickel and dime you for every ounce of work you give them. This person is likely to not launch or launch waaayyyy later than originally planned.
👉Fake Broke Billy
This client insists they’re broke, but they actually aren’t. So they’ll give you the same sob story and how broke they are, and often negotiate percentage deals. However, they aren’t broke… or at least not as broke as you. (For example, I once had a client give me a sob story about how they were broke… and then they put $20,000 on a credit card, including paying other venders four figures to do less work than I was doing.) This person is likely to not launch or launch waaayyyy later than originally planned.
This client makes everything about them. They expect you to respond to every call and email within minutes, drop every other client, and devote yourself exclusively to them and their project.
👉Boundary Pushing Pete
This is the type of client who’ll hire you for one thing, and before you know it, you’re running everything and working waaaaaay past scope.
👉Multiple Personality Mary
This type of client doesn’t know what they want and can’t let their inner visionary chaos stop for a day. So they’ll change everything as soon as you’ve built it, including their business name, lead magnet, and core offer… only to leave you having to redo it all to keep up.
👉Sexual Harasser Harry
This client will start off slightly flirty, and then fall into sexual harassment at some point. You’ll get the nagging suspicion they hired you just to be able to fantasize about sleeping with you.
👉Forever Failing Frank
This client seems to figure out how to cause every business and marketing strategy to fail. Doesn’t matter, it doesn’t work for them. This person seem so fail at everything they do, and will gladly blame you for their latest failure while insisting if only you’d tried harder, you could have saved them.
And of course, here are the amazing clients you’ll come across when you are authentically YOU and build your marketing so you attract ideal fit clients consistently:
This person is doing really amazing work… and their work is likely to change you in the process. This client is changing people’s lives and probably changes yours more than you change theirs, while insisting that isn’t the case. They pay well and respect your time.
This client is a BEAST. They have big dreams and they follow through, just as they said they would. They will implement what you say, move forward decisively, and launch on time.
👉Perfectly Reasonable Ron
This person is neither amazing nor terrible. They’re simply reasonable to work with. They pay well, show up, and respect what you have to say. They are, as the name suggests, reasonable people who get reasonable results.
👉Amazing Outcomes Oliver
Finally, there’s the knock-it-out-of-the-park client. This client gets BIG WINS and of course, provides an amazing testimonial/case study for future clients. They’re just great to work with.
And of course, YOU become a better consultant when you embrace your authentic expert status, because not only are you attracting great people who need help, you’re attracting those who’ll get GREAT results with you, which in turn makes you a better service provider because you’re only working with great people who’ll actually show up and get results. (#Win-win for everyone!)
If you’d like some help figuring out the whole “how to be an authentic expert” part, don’t worry. I’m offering my free, uber concise guide to the 11 components you need to have in sync. It’s available now.
P.S. If you’d like to upgrade your mindset so you can SHOW UP and GET RESULTS, here are a few resources:
- Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz
- Reinventing Your Life by Jeffrey E. Young
- Anything by Dan S. Kennedy
- #Mindfix Consulting with Erin Pheil